Excitable Edgar Faces Court Appearance

A CALVERTON CONVENIENCE STORE will be suing retailer John Lewis, it has been confirmed.

‘They’ve ripped off our idea for that Christmas telly advert,’ ranted McCoy’s employee Daz Plumb, 23, of Beck Avenue, Calverton.

‘We had our own advert – filmed it on my iPad and everything. Just like the John Lewis one. Adorable child makes friends with adorable dragon. The dragon’s quirky and comical but causes chaos and damage to everyone and everything around him every time he opens his ridiculous gob, so just like the Prime Minister.

‘And then lots of utterly cynical sentimental hi-jinks leading to a saccharine finale designed to make gullible numpties with more money than sense buy stuff from us instead of Amazon.

‘But chuffing John Lewis beat us to it. I hate them.

McColl’s will now be launching a different telly advert.

‘Same concept,’ said Daz.

‘Only with a duck, who gets killed by a car outside a Chinese restaurant.’